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Joke of the Day

"I'm not saying my ex wasn't pretty, but every time my wallet got stolen the thief would return her picture."

"I know someone that was frozen to absolute zero once. He was 0K."

"Martin asked David ""In which state does the Ohio River run?"" David answered with cool ""In the liquid state."""

"How do you prove human beings are inherently curious?"

"I saw a bumper sticker today..... I saw a bumper sticker today that said, ""My child has more chromosomes than yours (:"" .....what a retarded sense of humor"

"Chemistry joke as told by my teacher Organic Chemistry is hard, if you don't study for the test you'll be in alkynes of trouble."

"The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30% of their ice cream."

"I hate broken down white cars on the side of the hwy. They look just like cops when I'm speeding & shitting my pants is getting really old."

"A man walks up to a barman asking for a double entendre... He gave him one."

"They're remaking Ocean's 11 with an all-female cast and it's gonna be called Ocean's 8 It's that damn wage gap I tell ya!"