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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a guy with diarrhea who just had his father committed to the insane asylum? A crap happy chappy with a slap happy pappy."

"Did you hear about that guy named Reginald who often visited his local supermarket? Indeed, he was a **reg**ular customer."

"Yo Mama So Fat she sat on a rainbow and made skittles."

"Voldemort is like a teenage girl. He has a diary, a tiara, a special cup, a pet he adores, and an obsession with a famous teenage boy."

"What happens to Nitrogen when you put it in direct sunlight? It becomes DAYTROGEN!"

"A man turns to another and says: ""sitting here is almost as bad as being drunk"" the second man, confused, asks ""How bad can being drunk be?"" the first responds, ""Try asking a glass of water"""

"Why can't feminists change a light bulb? Because no matter how many you have they still can't change shit."

"Waldo collapses on the beach because it's August & he's fully clothed with a ski cap. You spot him easily"

"According to MyFitnessPal, I have been dead for 6 weeks."

"What kind of photograph does Arnold Schwarzenegger take? Polaroids."