39370

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about that guy named Reginald who often visited his local supermarket? Indeed, he was a **reg**ular customer."

Next Joke
 
"Me: *falls off a ladder* Wife: OH MY GOD! ARE YOU INJURED? Me: *obviously concussed but also bleeding* I'm injured and outjured"
"Here's a question. If you and your girlfriend/boyfriend/husband/wife switched phones and Facebook profiles for 24 hrs would you still have a relationship!!!!"
"Christmas lights remind me of some people I know. They all hang out together, half the fuckers don't work, and the ones that do aren't that bright!!!!"
"My wife asked me to stop singing Wonderwall... I said maybe"
"GF: ...I'm pregnant ME: *holding a 10-piece chicken nuggets box that actually has 11 nuggets* I've also got some pretty big news"
"Why should you never trust soap? It's an emulsive lyer."
"Almost had a threeseom. All i needed was 2 more girls."
"That toddler on a leash at the mall might be an unstoppable killing machine. You really don't know."
"Unicorn: Come on man, do it just one more time. Dragon: This is the last time. Unicorn: Hell yeah! Dragon: [toasts unicorns marshmallow]"