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Joke of the Day

"If you're ever feeling bad about your life just remember that there are people out there who bought tickets to the Kidz Bop world tour."

"I love taking long walks on the beach with my girlfriend.... Until the acid wears off and I realize I am just dragging a mannequin through the parking garage."

"What is Donald Trump's favourite ice cream? Walls Vanilla Carte D'or - It's not Mexican! (*I am going to hell for this!)"

"Why couldn't the scientist find salt for his breakfast? Because it was Na HA! Get it? Because Na=sodium and N/A=not available. Seriously, this is good clean fun."

"I just got my first hand job. I'm officially a manicurist."

"Why are redneck murders so hard to solve? There are no dental records and all the DNA is the same."

"Eddie's father called up to him 'Eddie if you don't stop playing that trumpet I think I'll go crazy!' Eddy replied 'I think you are already I stopped playing half an hour ago.'"

"""The snack that smiles back..."" ""Babies!"""

"[Standing still for a picture] I guess you can say I'm *turns around for a second and the camera goes off* not good at posing for pictures."

"Sometimes I masturbate while driving The passengers on my bus don't like it, but the high school hasn't fired me yet..."