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Joke of the Day

"Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a deck of cards Just sit down and I'll deal with you later"

"Bill Cosby and Ben Roethlisberger walk into a bar... I don't remember what happened next."

"Where do hipsters get their water? From a well, actually."

"It's too beautiful to stay inside today. That's why I moved my bed closer to the window."

"You know you've been friendzoned if a girl adds you as her brother on Facebook."

"Eggs What does an embryo say when it's serious? No yolk!"

"Roses are black... ...Violets are black, Everything is black, I'm Ray Charles."

"What does a cow who's a jerk grow up to be? Beef Jerky."

"What has 100 legs and sixteen teeth? The front row of a Willie Nelson concert."

"Liz from HR just called me in. I guess my thigh gap is distracting everyone, like that's my fault"