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Joke of the Day

"[Calls Ex-Girlfriend] Remember all those hair-ties and Bobby pins you lost? Well, I found all 5,000 while moving."

"Past, the present and the future.. The past, the present and the future all walk into a bar at the same time.. IT WAS TENSE!"

"My drug dealer really cracks me up. Ayyy."

"My doctor told me I needed to break a sweat once a day so I told him I'd start lying to my wife."

"A man crashed his car A man crashed his expensive car into a tree... He finally found out how the Mercedes bends"

"What do Monica Lewinsky and NFL players both have in common? It's their knees that go first."

"Which came first: the chicken or the egg? The rooster"

"Have you heard about the old wheel that got a new image? He retired."

"Ambitious workaholics in Taiwan typically have a Taipei personality."

"Intellectually challenged people who have sex with each other are fucking idiots."