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Joke of the Day

"What's the bright side of being knocked unconscious and raped? At least you get to start with an anonymous tip."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Biafra ! Biafra who ? Biafra'id be very afraid !"

"I'm going to be a clown for Halloween. So I can finally get shot."

"What did Ernie say when Bert asked him if he wanted some ice cream? Sherbert. (I can't take credit for this amazing piece of comedy. Heard it from a friend, no idea if he came up with it or not.)"

"What is a pedophiles favorite part about Halloween? Free delivery."

"My signature sex move is flirting like a pornstar then getting awkward as fcuk once it looks like something could actually happen."

"You'd think a dude named Captain Crunch would have amazing abs."

"What do you call a blonde in the freezer? Her parents named her Cindy so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow."

"Ever since I joined a French pedophilia group.. (Xpost r/imgoingtohellforthis) I've been on Claude, nine."

"Today I called the rape help line... But apparently it's just meant for the victims."