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Joke of the Day

"If my girlfriend slept with the whole Wu-Tang Clan, we'd have to break up because I wouldn't be cool enough to date her anymore."

"Before you cannibalize your roommate due to cabin fever, remember that you cannot afford the rent alone. #blizzard2016"

"Why did the Jamaican go to Syria? To get stoned"

"How many Chernobyl survivors does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They already glow."

"Did you hear about the pilot who went on sick leave? He had the flew."

"What does an egg say when it's drunk? Omelette"

"What do you call a man who jokes that women always make mountains out of molehills? An ambulance."

"eer booze and fun!' 'Ever hear the expression ""hard drinker"" ? Never made much sense to me drinking's one of the easiest things in the world to do."

"If olive oil comes from olives where does baby oil come from?"

"Worm CEO cuts workforce in half, doubles productivity"