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Joke of the Day

"I made a Starbucks barista cry I put my name down as Dad and he stood there calling it over and over again with no reply."

"if you wear a bikini instead of a bra you can go out with wet hair & people will just think you've been swimming which is athletic not lazy"

"I THINK [boyfriend goes by] YOU'RE TOO [boyfriend goes by] YOUNG FOR ME [boyfriend goes by] -me breaking up w/ my boyfriend at the carousel"

"The Difference Between Starkiller Base and The Death Star Starkiller base doesn't have a reactor core because it is a copyright of the fine bros."

"A foot fetish porn called ""I think we got off on the wrong foot"""

"What to you get if you cross a parrot with an elephant ? An animal that tells you everything that it remembers !"

"I've been watching so much porn lately that... I spit on my hot-dog before I put it on my bun..."

"Donald Trump, for the first time in his life, he goes and applies for a job And gets the position of President of the US"

"How do you get a fat girl into bed? Piece of cake"

"The best thing about owning a Smart Car is if you get too drunk at the bar you can just carry it home."