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Joke of the Day

"The Dalai Lama walks into a pizza place and says 'Make me one with everything'."

"I was just reminiscing with my friends about our day out at the clock museum... ...good times!"

"What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scotsman? The Rolling Stones sing ""Hey You! Get off of my cloud!"" A Scotsman shouts ""Hey Mcleod!! Get off of my ewe!"""

"I'm so patriotic; I piss red, white, and blue. My doctor told me it was pancreatic cancer. I told him to shut his commie mouth!"

"What's the most dishonest creature in the sea? The Lionfish."

"If you receive an e-mail that says: ''FREE JUSTIN BIEBER CONCERT TICKETS'' Don't open it! It may contain free Justin Bieber concert tickets."

"Two cannibals are eating a clown. One turns to the other and says... ""Does this guy taste funny to you?"""

"What does Snoop Dogg use to wash his clothes? bleotch!!"

"I saw an oldman get hit by a car. He didn't hear me say ""look out!"" Because I didn't say anything."

"[he picks me up on 1st date] Him: What do you have there? Me: [struggling, crawling to his car because my backpack is weighing me down] Ham."