96693

Joke of the Day

"The Dalai Lama walks into a pizza place and says 'Make me one with everything'."

"Apparently I pack an apple in my 5 year old's lunch so it can get out of the house for a few hours."

"Step 1) Get a job selling punctuation marks. Step 2) ?????? Step 3) Profit."

"My local police chief does a talk on heroin... So you can't understand any of it."

"I don't understand why the Lions and Vikings get to play on thanksgiving. Shouldn't the Patriots play the Redskins, and then steal their stadium?"

"I have one of those unlimited cell phone plans. There's no limit to how much they can charge me."

"What do a hurricane a tornado a fire and a divorce have in common? They are four ways you can lose your house!"

"An asian man goes to the eye doctor... The doctor says to him ""I know why you're not seeing so well, you have a cataract"" The asian man says ""No, I have a Rincoln Contirental"""

"Pretty fed up with the fact that pandemonium almost NEVER involves pandas."

"Enrique Iglesias wants to 1. Be your hero 2. Kiss away your pain 3. Stand by you forever Enrique Iglesias is your mother"