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Joke of the Day

"Wife: Did you give the kids a bath? Me: I got the dirt off. Wife: What does that mean? Me: *hides the leaf blower*"

"Q: You can sleep on it, brush your teeth with it and sit on it, what is it? A: A bed, a tooth brush, and a chair."

"What's the difference between the Holocaust and this joke? The Holocaust was funny."

"The only way I'd be scared of a ghost is if one was coming at me wearing a fitted sheet that I thought I'd have to eventually fold."

"I almost became a cop...... I decided to finish High School instead!"

"What's a porn star's favorite drink?"

"Why are no murders solved in West Virginia? Everyone has the same DNA and no one has any teeth."

"I dumped my boyfriend with a lazy eye. Turns out he was seeing chicks on the side."

"How do you find Will Smith in the snow? He's black, so should be pretty easy to spot against the white background"

"""oh holy crap this farmer just crucified a dude, maybe we shoud stay away from this farm"" - what crows realy think when they see a scarecrow"