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Joke of the Day

"[NSFW] The Fastest Man Alive ""Thank God you're here Premature Ejaculation Man!""Cried the helpless victim. ""I came as fast as I could!"" responded P.E. Man"

"why can't you fool aborted fetuses? because they weren't born yesterday."

"[flirting at Taco Bell] Trouble opening that sauce packet? Let me help. [seconds later] Let me help you get that sauce out of your hair."

"Seaside Treats by Rhoda Donkey"

"What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding half a worm."

"What did the robot hit-man say to his robot victim? ""Nothing personal."""

"What is JPA? Joke point average. Where do people with high JPAs go to? Hahaharvard"

"What do Bill Cosby and Santa Claus have in common? They both come when you're alseep."

"Came up with a somewhat original dead child joke today. How is a ten year old different from a pizza? Pizza doesn't beg for you to finish it off when you only eat half of it."

"Why doesn't ISIS attack Israel? Same reason children don't attack their parents..."