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Joke of the Day

"Shoutout to my Cold War reenactment group! We're just a bunch of chill white guys, sitting at a table, acting stressed about the USSR."

"What do you call a Chinese man with a video camera (racism free) Phil Ming"

"What's the difference between a porcupine and a Ferrari? With a porcupine, the prick is on the outside."

"Parenting a baby is like an etch-a-sketch drawing. You must be careful, but if you mess up just shake the shit out of it and make a new one."

"For my birthday... For my birthday I got myself glasses. So my observational comedy's really improved"

"[After 20 min at your house] I used all your toilet paper ""Check in the cabine-"" All of it ""We have more in the gar-"" All of it all of it"

"What does an unborn fetus and a tube of toothpaste have in common? Neither of them can be used as functional tables."

"I'm curious about the first person who saw an egg drop out of a chicken & said, ""I'm going to eat that."""

"What do you call a Chatbook that consists solely of pictures of your poop? A Shatbook."

"How do secret agents complement a disguise? ""Hey James, that disguise is incogNEATo!"""