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Joke of the Day

"For my birthday... For my birthday I got myself glasses. So my observational comedy's really improved"

"What's the only way a Trumpie can get hard? Freezing to death."

"what's big, black and looks good on a lawyer's neck? a doberman"

"The next time I hear a racist or sexist joke, I won't stand for it!! I'll sit because it's much more comfortable."

"I save a lot of money on all my tooth extractions by engaging in street fights.."

"I'm reading a book about a duck who questions it's faith in God . . . It's called ""Are you there God, it's me magret de canard"""

"How can you tell when a Canadian is successful? He dies in his LA home at 82."

"I was late to a meeting traveling to West Virginia. I forgot to reset my watch to the mid 1800s."

"""My girlfriend? You wouldn't know her. She's a bit underground."" ...said the hipster necrophiliac."

"I went to a paraplegic fundraiser It was crawling with pussy"