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Joke of the Day

"Carl: ""It's chilly out."" Me: ""Tell me something I don't know."" ""Two dogs were hanged during the Salem witch trials."" ""Fair enough, Carl."""

"What did Putin say after listening to the West whine about the invasion of Ukraine Crimea river baby"

"What did Michael Jackson almost name his daughter? Nata-LEE-HEE!"

"Officer- I'm giving you a ticket for your speed Me- That's heroin Officer-... Me- Want some? Officer-... Me- Oooh, shiny handcuffs"

"What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? Alive."

"Diarrhea is heredity in my family It runs in our genes"

"How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up."

"My girlfriend asked me: ""If you won the lottery, would you still love me?"" And I answered: ""Of course! I'd miss you, but I still love you"""

"Customer: Why doesn't this restaurant have any specials? Waiter: Because nothing about this food is special."

"A friend of mine got married on top of a mountain last year. Aye they say it was all downhill from there."