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Joke of the Day
"Why is Budweiser like sex in a kayak? Its fucking close to water."
Next Joke
"Guy threw a banana peel out the window into my lane 2day. Yrs of practice paid off and I arrived to work safely. Thank you Mario Kart."
"Carrie Knock! Knock! Who's there? Carrie. Carrie who? Carrie on with what you're doing, I'm at the wrong door."
"A Giraffe walks into a bar...... .... He looks at everyone and says: ""High Balls on me!"""
"Not saying I'm special but kids these days never have any money behind their ears."
"Did you hear about the woman who replaced her addiction to ornithology with alcohol? She was described as being off her tits."
"Why does Steven Hawking hate the band Muse? Because he can't stand their song Uprising, it wants him to rise up and take the power back."
"A yoga pants owner, an uggs owner, and an iphone owner walks into a starbucks She orders a drink - Pumpkin Spice Latte"
"If I knew then what I know now, I would have been a really creepy, sexually frustrated toddler."
"My fridge exploded. . . And there are pieces of de-brie everywhere."