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Joke of the Day
"I like my women like I like my coffee... Ground up and in my freezer."
Next Joke
"What is the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes back from the camp."
"[crumpled up paper on floor] *tries to flip it up like hacky sack* *tries to flip it up...* *tries to flip...* *tries...* *leaves it*"
"I was at the ATM, and this old lady asked me to help check her balance, So I pushed her over."
"Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"
"What's Rickon Starks favourite band? One Direction"
"I won a waterfight with the local kids at the park. No ones a match for me and my kettle!"
"There are two types of people Those who use false dichotomies, and those who don't."
"Just hung a picture of Steve Buscemi over my daughters toothbrush to ensure proper brushing."
"DOG 911: What's ur emer- DOG: OWNER IS CATCHIN POKEMON DOG 911: So DOG: HE'S THROWING BALLS BUT I CAN'T FIND THEM DOG 911: OMG DOG: OMG"