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Joke of the Day

"In college a dirty $20 bill tried to have sex with me. I didn't have a condom so I declined because you never want to get Financial AIDS."

"Secret: Something which is told to one person at a time."

"I have a big butt and I can not lie."

"What did the necrophiliac have at the funeral Mourning wood"

"What's musical and useful at the grocery store? A Chopin Liszt Note: taken from one of those horrible ""Joke of the Day"" desk calendars. It took almost 12 months to get something clever."

"A political joke for Americans I'm voting for hillary"

"It's been so long since I bought groceries, this morning I saw a cockroach move out. ""Good luck,"" he sighed, clutching his tiny suitcases."

"What should you care? My grandfather always said, ""Don't watch your money, watch your health."" So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my money. It was my grandfather."

"What is the difference between acne and gay men? Acne only attacks little boys when they reach puberty"

"Marriage should be traditional. As it was in The Bible. Between a man and a rib."