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Joke of the Day

"There's a part of me that still loves you. I hit that part with a hammer. Stupid part."

"What do men and slurpees have in common? If you don't suck them fast enough they lose their shape."

"What's a Polar Bear's favourite soup? A laksa."

"It doesn't matter where you are, an old lady is about to be in your way."

"If she takes off her heels to chase you, then you better call the police while you still can."

"Why wont ISIS bomb my local Walmart? ...because its not a Target."

"Yo momma jokes are old, common and used by everyone. Just like yo momma."

"I went for my physical yesterday. Nurse came in the room and she said ""I'm going to have to ask you to stop masturbating"" I was like ""What? Why!?"" She said ""because I'm trying to do your physical!"""

"What do you tell someone annoying you need a moment? One sec, cunt."

"What do you call the science of knives? Cutting edge technology."