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Joke of the Day

"your momma so stupid she got locked in a groceiry store and starved."

"Are you a shark, cause I got some swimmers for you to swallow."

"Sometimes it is very important if a sentence was said by a man or a woman A good example: ""I used a whole pack of tissues during that awesome movie yesterday!"""

"What did the man who survived a javelin headwound say to his opponent? Thanks for opening my mind."

"Did you hear about the guy who tried to drown his wife with cough syrup before finally strangling her to death? He was jailed for pre-medicated murder."

"Vagina jokes aren't funny Period."

"What do you call a fight between a Mexican and a pedophile? Alien vs Predator"

"Why do the French eat snails? Because they don't like fast food."

"I think I'm emotionally constipated ...I haven't given a shit in days. (my daughter told me this just now new to me, hope it's new to you too)"

"I met this really hot Geologist today. She had quite a Gneiss ass."