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Joke of the Day

"When I had no money, I had few friends, but no enemies Btw, I still have no money, in case you were thinking of becoming my friend or enemy"

"What do you call a president crossing the road? A presidestrian"

"""All men are the same."" Said a chineese woman as she lost her husband in a crowd."

"I lost my virginity to a retarded girl last night. I wanted it to be special"

"What's even harder to find than Bigfoot, UFOs, the Loch Ness Monster, and diamonds in Minecraft? The real download button on Softpedia.com"

"It would be wrong to ask a one-eyed person if it really was all fun and games up until that point, right?"

"""Your word is their..."" ""Your word is their,"" said the spelling bee judge. The contestant, confused, asked for a sentence. ""They're looking for their dog over there,"" replied the judge."

"On dating sites, some of the options for 'body type' should be, 'Vending machine', 'deformed walrus' and 'pudding in garbage bag'."

"Einstein developed a theory about space... ...it was about time too."

"Marriage has taught me that communication is key. I talk to my therapist & she talks to hers. Its not perfect, but its progress."