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Joke of the Day

"I'd rather have Samuel L Jackson narrate my life.. No offense, Morgan Freeman.. My life requires multiple uses of the word m 0therfcuker."

"Sayings always said with sarcasm. Any examples? I hate to say I told you so. No sarcasm: I...I truly hate to say I told you so."

"What do you call an airplane that has sex with both men and women? A biplane."

"You're only as good as your last tweet."

"The relationship stages;- :* :'("

"I'm not a Grammar Nazi! I'm alt-write."

"Knock knock Whos there? G.I JOE!!!"

"What's George Washington's least favorite flower? Li[e]-lacs!"

"Where does Muscle Milk come from? Muscle mammary"

"Did you hear about the hungry clock? It went back four seconds."