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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear the energizer bunny was arrested? He was charged with battery"

"what did the faggot faggot the faggot? because faggot hahahaha"

"Why did the semen cross the road? I wore the wrong socks today."

"Clerk: Why do you need 200 condoms? Me: I have a beard and an accent. *winks* *Spends night making balloon animals"

"Wife: wow, we must have had a lot of trick or treaters come by! Me: wha? Her: Because all the candy is gone Me: Ooooh right. So many."

"So you're all Obama fans now? Name 3 of his albums."

"Why do pagans make the best husbands and wives? Because they'll worship the ground you walk on."

"What do women and Tony Stark have in common? They are both Fe Males."

"Texting...because men didn't have a hard enough time understanding women before so we had to take away the ability to convey tone."

"How do you keep Trump busy for the rest of his term? Tell him his twitter phone is in the corner of his office."