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Joke of the Day

"Postman told me he was going on holidays.... I asked him if it was Parcelona or Istampbul he was headed to... Just said it was a stag do for his friend Ah, an all mail party I exclaimed"

"Have you heard of the new band The Transmission Lines? I hear they have so much potential."

"Looking out the hospital window while mom is resting on bed. That was either dad or superman falling of the roof."

"[Ouija board] Me: Demon? I-W-I-L-L-E-A-T-Y-O-U-R-E-S-O-U-L Me: *your Y-O-U-K-N-O-W W-H-A-T-I-D-O-N-T-W-A-N-T-Y-O-U-R-S-O-U-L-A-N-Y-M-O-R-E"

"I once farted in an elevator. It was wrong in so many levels."

"Now let me tell you a joke about a hair dryer... ... nah nevermind. It blows."

"How many redditors does it take to post a joke to /r/jokes? Only one. **/r/Jokes** is **widely known** to be a **breeding ground** for new, **original jokes**."

"[wife calls] did you write ""make all the traps from home alone"" on the calendar [me at hardware store holding paint cans and feathers] ""no"""

"a neanderthal scrawls a message on a cave wall, the etchings begin to glow red as he exceeds 140 characters"

"I've been saving up for a sex change, I don't care what my wife says. SHE'S GOING TO HAVE IT!"