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Joke of the Day

"Today a man knocked on my door And asked for a donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water."

"Why don't lobsters like to share? Because they're ""shellfish"""

"What is Captain Ahab's favorite reggae band? Bob Marley and The Whalers!"

"Some people just want to watch the world burn. Other people just don't vote for Trump."

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? Donald Trump has never had a garbanzo bean on him."

"How did Harry potter get down the mountain? Running... JK rolling"

"Who is fastest girl in the world? Answer: Airtel 4G girl."

"I woke up this morning and forgot which side the sun rises from. Then it dawned on me."

"What do you call a man who loses pounds for a living? A bad gambler"

"[talking to life insurance agent] Let me get this right. I pay you until I die, then someone ELSE gets the money? No thanks."