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Joke of the Day

"I don't know how well Fast & Furious 8 will do in the box office I mean, without Paul Walker, it'll probably just crash and burn, really."

"[marriage counseling] She thinks I make bad decisions ""He hired a clown for my nana's funeral"" PEOPLE NEEDED CHEERING UP, KAREN"

"Family...Friends....Fun...Fridays. All good things start with ""F""."

"What did the old zombie dog say when she got a birthday bone? *My hip!*"

"A crazed fan attacked Miley Cyrus at a recent concert. Damn, I would have LOVED to have seen the look on her gums."

"A great way to get a cw to stop talking to you permanently is to start clipping your toenails in the middle of their story"

"""Mounting debt"" sounds way sexier than it is."

"What do you call 4 dogs and a black bird? Spice girls"

"How much does a German weigh? Teutons."

"If there's a denim jacket on my doorknob it means I'm having sex with a werewolf."