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Joke of the Day

"Two pigs robbed a bank. Why were they caught so quickly? They squealed on each other."

"Abortion jokes are never funny. So if you accidentally start forming one, you should terminate it before it comes to fruition."

"Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead."

"Why is one thousand million billion trillion so bad? It's very naughty"

"What happens when a lighter smokes weed? It becomes a high-lighter!"

"I was surprised that Lil Jon endorsed a presidential candidate... BERN DOWN FOR WHAT?!?"

"I was asked today why I thought Kim Kardashian & Kanye West would break up. I replied ""dunno, but they're BOUND 2 EVENTUALLY"" I hate myself."

"I bought some pot from a T-Rex ... ... he was a small arms dealer."

"First comes the wedding And 5 months later comes the baby."

"The principal confiscated my CD's and microSD full of songs from 1980's shoot-em-up video games, specifically the ones mentioning eagles. He said it was illegal contraband."