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Joke of the Day

"Having a ""20 items or less"" express lane at Wal-Mart is pointless when your customers don't know how to count."

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"Saw a young couple holding hands today & it reminded me that I need to buy a bottle of vodka"
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"Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once."
"What's a great way to say I love you to your wife? I have a heart-on for you. Credit where credit is due: -Wayne Gretzky -Michael Scott"
"Being a parent means you have to make gigantic sacrifices like quality sleep and the backs to every remote control in your house."
"What do male prostitutes and Inspector Clouseau have in common? They're both Peter Sellers"
"How does a religious extremist convert an atheist into a holy man? They use a machine gun."
"This poor old lady slipped and fell on the ice today..... at least I think she was poor she only had 75 cents in her purse."
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