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Joke of the Day

""" So the boat was about to sink until I attached a sail to my boner and made it safely to shore"" Me if I was on the Titanic."

"""Hello, barman? Give me another drink!"" I yelled. He said, ""I think you've had enough, sir."" ""What makes you say that?"" I laughed. He said, ""I'm a taxi driver."""

"My friend is anti-semantic... He never writes anymore edit: (semantic refers to words for those who don't get it.)"

"What's an ""oying""? This joke"

"My card got declined buying toilet paper shit."

"What lies on its back, 100 feet in the air? A dead centipede."

"Sorry I'm late... I was at the hospital *cough* my boyfriend has tuberculosis."

"Life Pro Tip: Putting your phone in airplane mode will stop ads while you play."

"Saw that Poland just won the country's first gold metal.... they were so happy, they had it bronzed!"

"Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 122, 123, 124!"