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Joke of the Day

"PESSIMIST: Dark tunnel. OPTIMIST: Light at the end of the tunnel. REALIST: A train. TRAIN OPERATOR: 3 idiots standing on the tracks."

"What do airlines and prostitutes have in common? You pay them and get fucked"

"How do you organize a space party? You planet."

"What did the feminist say in her intro to computer programming course? I hate this class, it keeps objectifying me!"

"I turned my phone onto ""Airplane mode"" and threw it up into the air... Worst transformer ever"

"I cannot even fathom how deep the snow is back east! Get my drift?"

"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Don't be silly, feminists don't change anything."

"Brussel sprouts are like anal sex. If you were forced to have them against your will as a child, chances are you won't enjoy them as an adult."

"Warning: Dead baby joke What's the difference between a dead baby and a rock. You can't fuck a rock."

"I have as much authority as the Pope, i just don't have as many people who believe it."