112226

Joke of the Day

"Brussel sprouts are like anal sex. If you were forced to have them against your will as a child, chances are you won't enjoy them as an adult."

"It only takes one drink to get me drunk The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or fourteenth."

"My girlfriend says she's my best friend but she got so mad when I called her a homo and threw a snowball at her face. Women are so confusing"

"I was surprised Oscar Pistorius owned a gun in the first place. I would have thought he preferred blades."

"What do you call an army of toddlers? Infantry."

"Why do Jewish men get circumcised? Because Jewish women love anything 20% off."

"Knock knock. Who's there? Doctor."

"I just saw a guy with no legs. I told him all about my recent stubbed toe. I hope it made him feel better about the whole no legs thing."

"[OC] My therapist asked me what was my earliest erotic remembrance and I told him it was wearing my mother's lingerie when I was a child. he said it was probably a Freudian slip."

"What's black and always behind bars? Guinness (You bunch of racists)"