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Joke of the Day

"You couldn't even imagine how good I am at taking a fake phone call to get out of a boring conversation. It's Oscar worthy."

"Why is a gun better than a woman? You can buy a silencer for a gun"

"What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas? ""Thanks, I'll never part with it."""

"What do japanese men do when they have erections? Vote"

"(Awful joke)What did the Elephant say while scolding her children? Tusk Tusk I am so sorry"

"Me on Masterchef: Ive made a roasted pork kebab breaded with buttermilk cornbread and served with a tomato reduction Them: This is a corndog"

"Excuse me, here's your nose. I found it in my business."

"What do you call a penguin with a machine gun? Sir. [Groan worthy penguin jokes](https://allwrong.wordpress.com/2007/10/05/penguin-riddles/)"

"[Ouija board in Starbucks] ""Speak to me spirits"" O M G H A V E U S E E N W H A T K R I S T Y I S W E A R I N G G R O S S"

"What did the vinaigrette say to the refrigerator? ""Close the door! I'm dressing!"""