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Joke of the Day

"Why did the blind man use chopsticks? Because he couldn't see the point in forks."

"Fun typo: ""You ate the most important thing in my life."""

"Putin and Medvedev go to a hooker. The hooker is sucking Putin off and Medvedev is fucking her from behind. Medvedev: Should we swap? Putin: Sure, you can swap."

"I decided to have a can of soup for lunch today... ...And hating to see good food go to waste, I decided to have the soup as well."

"It is known... ..by everyone except Jon Snow. He knows nothing."

"When my girlfriends says.. ""People think that.."" - *people* is often her friend Lisa."

"What do you call a scientific measuring instrument with degrees? A graduated cylinder. -------------------------------------------------------------------- This is the only joke I've ever thought of."

"I treat women like I do numbers.... If they're under 16, do them in your head."

"Before I workout, I like to warm up with 10 sets of selfie's."

"I can't believe how much of this stuff at the self checkout is free."