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Joke of the Day

"Drop what you're doing right now and go take a look at tonight's moon in the iPhone weather app. Gorgeous."

"Why should they have hosted the World Cup in a different country this year? .... because a brazillian things could go wrong"

"First witch: Here's a banana if you can spell it. Second witch: I can spell banana. I just don't know when to stop."

"Knock Knock Who's there ? Cows ! Cows who ? Cows go 'moo' not who !"

"100 million years ago there were no creationists."

"Keep an identical glass of vodka next to the glass of water on your bedside table for a refreshing morning game of Russian Roulette"

"I've started dating Little Red Riding Hood's gran. She's an animal in bed."

"Me: Santa, why are women so scary? Santa: dude come on, I make $8.50 an hour, get off me."

"My wife and I moved to a new house. It's the only place I've lived where I can tolerate the neighbours. It's next to a cemetery."

"Q-How did the gay guy feel when he went shopping? A= Like a **girl**. *Lol*"