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Joke of the Day

"The sausage mogul Jimmy Dean has passed away. Someone just sent me the link!!!!"

"As a kid I was frightened of the dentist... Because he was a Paedophile every time I went in he'd give me a filling"

"[lumberjack interview] BOSS: I'm gonna ""axe"" you a few questions. Haha do you get it? ME: Yeah I ""saw"" that coming BOSS: Ooo welcome aboard!"

"[woman on death row] ""Your last meal?"" - I don't care. You pick. ""Fish?"" - Gross no ""Steak?"" - No. Anything is fine tho. ""Pasta?"" - Ew carbs"

"I like my women the way I like my beer Ginger"

"What is Jesus' favorite mathematical operation? The Cross Product"

"Why do bald men cut holes in there pockets? To run their hands through their hair"

"7% of all hearing loss is a result of sitting in a restaurant next to a table full of women who just received dessert."

"Yoga is really kicking in. I'm seeing the definition in my arms and overall flexibility. My vibrator is gonna be really impressed."

"Did you here about the scientist who got cooled to absolute zero? He's 0K now."