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Joke of the Day

"[woman on death row] ""Your last meal?"" - I don't care. You pick. ""Fish?"" - Gross no ""Steak?"" - No. Anything is fine tho. ""Pasta?"" - Ew carbs"

"I beat my chess opponent in less than five moves with a baseball bat."

"I'm about to pound some meat. Sadly this is not a euphemism. Again. *sigh*"

"Still haven't found the manly way to walk across ice."

"What can you find between the toes of the African elephant? Slow Africans."

"How much does it cost for a pirate to get his ears pierced A buccaneer"

"Just the punchline... ...So then he says, ""But wait officer, you can't arrest me! I was only half-hard!"""

"I don't know whats more awkward, answering Dora, or sitting in silence while she stares at you."

"Q: How do you know when a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies? A: You find M&M shells all over the kitchen floor."

"Did you hear the joke with the punchline that is invisible to idiots?"