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Joke of the Day

"Why do they never serve a beer at math party? Because you can't drink and derive"

"Chess with Australians must get so confusing. ""Check, mate."" ""Naw mate, that's just a check."" ""That's what I said. Check, mate"""

"I went to a psychic today. Ended up accidentally breaking her crystal ball. It cost me a fortune."

"My kids are giving all the people on this plane a hard lesson in birth control right now."

"I don't suffer insomnia like most tweeters do. I always get a solid 7, maybe 8 minutes of sleep every night."

"What do you call a stallion that's had its balls chopped off? A eunuch-orn"

"In capitalist America, you grab people by the pussy. In Soviet Russia, you seize the means of reproduction."

"Every time you say you're humble, I want to buy you a dictionary."

"I signed up for the Do Not List list, but was immediately removed as I had requested."

"What was Dr Frankenstein's second job? He was a body-builder"