85281

Joke of the Day

"Wanna know my secret to rock hard abs? I ride the mechanical duck outside the grocery store 300 times a day."

"At 31 years old, I decided to grow up, kick a bad habit and stopped biting my nails. The nosebleeds are getting annoying, though."

"[Sea fishing] Me: This is fun. [Deep sea fishing] Me: Many men go fishing all their lives without knowing that it's not fish they're after."

"How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? Eleven. One chief of police to oversee it, and 10 cops to beat the lightbulb until it wants to change."

"""Oh snap!"" - branches"

"I wanna make a joke about sodium, but Na.."

"Women Odors A man walks up to a woman and says ""Excuse me, can I smell your pussy?"" She says ""no"" He says ""Oh, then it must be your socks"""

"How did the frog die? He kermitted suicide. I'm sorry"

"I heard Baja Fresh has a new burrito called the Ravens. It has everything on it but Rice."

"While I'm not much of a cook, I know enough to cut sandwiches in triangles to make them taste better."