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Joke of the Day
"What happens if you cut off your left hand? You would be all right."
Next Joke
"wife: Feeling better? me: Yeah wife: Kind of overreacted to a cold didn't you? [flashback to me calling the Make-A-Wish Foundation] me: No"
"A penguin walks into a bar and asks ""Has my brother been in here?"" And the bartender says ""I don't know. What does he look like?"""
"I love my dog. He's a real son-of-a-bitch."
"what's th difference between a gay man and a refrigerator? the refrigerator doesn't fart when you take the meat out."
"I rang my telecom provider. Before I got through , I had to say ""Jump through the hoop! Do a flip!"" They said my call may be recorded for training porpoises."
"What did one poop say to the other poop? You smell"
"What is the difference between a well dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bike? *Attire.*"
"How did the farmer find his wife? He tractor down."
"Home Alone (1990) A know-it-all, suburban elitist cruelly humiliates two economically anxious men, seeking to improve their lives"