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Joke of the Day

"Just ate a Hot Pocket filled with pasta alfredo because my body is a landfill and I don't ever want a husband"

Next Joke
 
"AMA I left the Church of Scientology two weeks ago [Deleted]"
"What do gamers make for New Years? A New Years RESOLUTION"
"Sometimes I run alongside trains, tearfully waving, just so people will think I have a girlfriend."
"911: what is your emergency? Me: HE READ BUT DIDN'T REPLY"
"What did the Sadist do to the Masochist? Nothing."
"My mind is always on fast forward while my body's in slow motion. I'm just like that channel where the sound is out-of-sync w/ the picture."
"I want some Chuck Norris jokes! Something like: *Chuck Norris can believe it's not butter.* or *Jesus may be able to walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land.*"
"The only thing my girlfriend blows is everything out of proportion."
"You are living proof that manure can sprout legs and walk."
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