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Joke of the Day
"Why did Jesus hang on the cross for three days? He forgot the safe word."
Next Joke
"Yo mama so ugly just after she was born her mother said ""What a treasure!"" and her father said ""Yes let's go bury it."""
"Little Brother: I'm going to buy a sea horse. Big Brother: Why? Little Brother: Because I want to play water polo!"
"[cuddling] her: what are you thinking about? me: these pretzels are making me thirsty"
"My doctor said if I get 1000 upvotes he will perform free LASIK surgery! Upvote for visibility."
"Perhaps Nicki Minaj just lost a series of bets."
"my sleep schedule says ""party girl"" but my lifestyle says ""reclusive lunatic"""
"It is better to have loved and lost than have your face ripped off by a chimpanzee"
"I poured spot remover on my dog Now he's gone"
"What's the difference between a blonde and a washing machine? They both drip when they're fucked."