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Joke of the Day

"People really hate my cheesy puns... but I'm quite fondue of them."

"What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my wiener in a car exhaust pipe"

"What starts with e, ends with e, and has one letter in it? An envelope."

"Why did the Republican get a sunburn? Because the sunscreen instructed to apply liberally and he was unwilling to compromise."

"A termite walks into a bar... And asks, ""Is the bartender here?""."

"LPT: Always sneeze when calling in sick to work So your boss always ""nose"" that you are really sick."

"I'll never understand women. A species that loathes you for asking their age, but tortures you forever if you forget their birthday."

"Why did the Pakistani cook get fired? He could only cook eggs Sunni side up and, honestly, they tasted like Shi'ite."

"[first day as diving instructor] Guy [from the back]: what's the signal for a shark Me: sharks don't really give signals they just show up"

"X post from meanjokes: michael schumacher regained consciousness today, have your heard how the doctors did it? They sat him on the window seat of the bus"