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Joke of the Day

"Why is a bad government like a bikini? Because people marvel at what's holding it up. And they wish it would fall."

"My problem is, I'm about 30% stud, and 70% muffin."

"Sometimes I feel like people are just using me for my likes."

"NSFW: Why do women wear panties with flowers on them? In the loving memory of all the faces that have been buried there."

"If you show up to a job interview high and tired... You're hired!"

"Two black guys go into a convenience store, Pay for their stuff and leave."

"How did I get out of Iraq? I ran"

"Sony has a site where you can watch The Interview for $5.99 and I can't think of a single reason not to trust them with my credit card info."

"What has four legs and quacks? A paradox"

"The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30% of their ice cream."