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Joke of the Day

"Two black guys go into a convenience store, Pay for their stuff and leave."

"How do you get your dog to come? Fuck it."

"""Go to hell"" is so abstract. ""Get trapped in a porta potty for 67 months."" Now that's specific. That's possible. That's terrifying."

"Does life imitate art or does art imitate life? Either way I've lost 1000 dollars playing poker with these dogs"

"The problem with marriage is that it was invented when people lived to the ripe old age of 30."

"When I make Breakfast all I want is a ""Thank You"", Not ""Who are you and how did you get into my house"""

"Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971) A bunch of freeloaders lie around in bed & support themselves by violating child labor laws."

"ww2 Russia be like... You better Czech yourself before you rek yourself."

"Group hugs are like.... Group hugs are like a G rated orgy"

"I was tired yesterday and now I'm tired again today I'm retired"