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Joke of the Day
"The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30% of their ice cream."
Next Joke
"What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter? Pumpkin Pi"
"Q: What did the Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant? A: ""Dead ant Dead Ant ... Dead ant Dead Ant .. Dead Ant"" (to the tune of Pink Panther theme)."
"Texting drivers running over texting pedestrians: a modern day zombie apocalypse."
"I had to stop drinking. I kept getting that thing where you feel sick and your head hurts... Depression."
"I appreciate it when my cats stand around while I clean their litter box. We're like a little road crew: one guy works, three supervise."
"What do you call a Frenchman with eleven penises? Jean Cocteau"
"What supervillain do you know the least about? Loki , because he is low-key."
"Isn't it so weird when you're thinking about someone and then they suddenly appear? Anyway, my dad just caught me masturbating."
"My boyfriend is so bad at tongue-twisters, he can't even say ""I love you"" ONE times fast!!"