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Joke of the Day

"A lady in front of me at Walmart today had six kids and was buying a baby gate. I wanted to tell her, ""if that's for your vagina, you're too late!"""

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"I'm almost always naked when ordering food It really weirds out the drive-thru attendant"
"two pedophiles talking... I was with this girl last night.... how old is she? she is three... YUCK, that walks... sorry"
"I was going to post this funny incest joke last night... But I was too busy nailing OP's mom"
"I had sex in a hall of mirrors. I was fucking beside myself."
"If a person becomes a murderer they go to jail If a cop becomes a murderer they get paid vacation."
"Finally found a house! We couldn't afford it and it wasn't for sale, but we just murdered the owners and took it anyway. Happy Columbus Day!"
"Bill Gates went into an Apple store... Farted, and stank up the whole place. But it's their fault for not having Windows."
"Ever been so tired at work that people thought you were drunk? I hope so because that's the only excuse I have for being drunk at work."
"I'm already getting into the Thanksgiving spirit, I've given the bird to lots of people today."