178432

Joke of the Day

"Finally found a house! We couldn't afford it and it wasn't for sale, but we just murdered the owners and took it anyway. Happy Columbus Day!"

"Watching the olympic 100m is like witnessing a crime You hear a gunshot and a second after you see 8 black guys running away."

"Chuck Norris doesn't get hangovers. He just gets pissed."

"Why wasn't the vampire working? He was on his coffin break."

"I'm really conflicted about abortion. I support killing babies, but I don't support giving women a choice."

"One day, you wake up and everyone has a number over their heads. The number is counting down by the second. Eventually, someone's number reaches zero, and.... They sneeze. Their number resets."

"Jokes About ESl classroom What is the longest word in the English language? SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!"""

"i enjoy video games because they let me live out my wildest fantasies, like being assigned a task and then completing that task"

"Why did the man smear peanut butter on the road? To go with the traffic jam."

"White House Update: Dick Cheney extends hunting invitation to Trump Nope. Sorry. Just kidding. Edit: buncha scrubs keep downvoting my hilarious joke."