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Joke of the Day

"What do you get when you mix human DNA and goat DNA? Kicked out of the petting zoo."

"How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber? Ask them to pronounce ""unionized""."

"I am waiting for the day we have a national scandal involving a gate"

"*shipwrecked diary* Day 1: alone, doing well. Mentally sound. Met a crab Day 2: crab seems untrustworthy Day 3: CRA B LEAR N ING TO WRI TE"

"How many US Congressmen does it take to change a lightbulb? Oh, please. Like they've ever changed anything that needed it."

"I recently came into a lot of money. The bank teller wasn't happy about having to use gloves."

"Tom should concentrate less on Myspace and more on his shoe business"

"Pregnant - Beyonce Pregnant with twins - Beytwice"

"My ex was like a computer game. Started off easy, got a little harder and eventually I ended up cheating."

"The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts while the stupid ones are full of confidence."