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Joke of the Day
"I've never hated a neighbour enough to get wind chimes."
Next Joke
"I'm so good at this Fitbit thing! I reached my daily step goal before I even left my bed this morning!"
"What do you call a group of medical professionals who navigate around the Horn of Africa without being accosted by pirates? Doctors without boarders."
"Whats a baby's favourite temperature? Womb tempertaure"
"Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew Phew The Chosen Phew"
"It looks like we got about 4 inches of snow last night ... Or as my boyfriend calls it... 7."
"the series finale of Game of Thrones will be the camera pulling back & revealing it was a snowglobe and the owner is watching sports instead"
"How do you get a kid to stay low to the ground? ""DUCK!"" How do you get a kid up and running? ""GOOSE!"""
"A Jewish girl.. ..asks her father, ""Dad? Can I have 50 dollars?"" he says, ""40 dollars? What do you need 30 dollars for?"""
"What does a lesbian couple do for fun while they're having their periods? Fingerpaint!"