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Joke of the Day

"Is that a sweet potato in your pants, or are you just oddly shaped?"

"What do you call a slav tree? A Dimitree."

"I'm like a dead owl... I just don't give a hoot anymore."

"I broke my finger last week On the other hand, i'm ok"

"A driver gets pulled over for improper use of a carpool lane.. Cop: ""Carpool lane is 2 or more passengers and I don't see your second passenger."" Driver: ""well I'm just beside myself."""

"Chuck Norris was what Willis was talking about."

"Nothing's labeled clearly, I was promised tea & never got any, the criminal justice system is barbaric. ~ Alice's Yelp review of Wonderland"

"Q: What do you call the folks who hang around the musicians at conservatories? A: Violists."

"My proctologist gave me two thumbs up. Which I did not appreciate."

"Occasionally, a true friend gives his paw not his hand..."